Confused and curious as to what was making my roommate hold his sides from splitting while tears of laughter swelled in his eyes, I looked over my shoulder to what he was pointing at.
It was my dresser which sits right next to my bed. Hasn't been touched in months. I share with you a photo of it, in its original form:
Allow me to describe the contents individually.
- An unopened can of Natural Light Beer. Not sure how that got there. Perhaps it was forgotten on some random party night. Perhaps I was hoping for a little extra boost of liquid courage when I hit the sheets. That'll swoon the ladies. clASSy.
- A very used, very beaten up copy of Nick Hornby's High Fidelity. My best friend Rick let me borrow his copy years ago and I haven't given it back. One of my all time favorite books and it was extremely comforting to read during the first few months of my break up. You can't see it from this angle, but there are about 100 sticky notes crammed in between pages, put there when I came across parts in which I thought, "Fuck yeah."
- A copy of JD Salinger's Catcher in the Rye. That speaks for itself.
- Half consumed box of Gobstoppers. I love candy. Usually always have some kind of candy near me at all time. I'm a 24 year old stuck in the body of a 16 year old with the interests of a 12 year old.
- A pile of unused Durex condoms. There's a thick layer of dust building on those bad boys.
Leo: Dude, no wonder you don't get laid. Clean up your shit.