How to Break Up with Someone You Aren't Dating

I'm really starting to come to a boiling point with Janice. I can't handle this having-a-girlfriend-relationship when I haven't even DONE anything with this girl. I haven't slept with her, I haven't kissed her, I haven't even had an awkward hand-holding experience with her.

So what the fuck!?

All weekend, I've been receiving calls from Janice. When I don't answer, I get a text literally SECONDS later asking, "Are you mad at me? Why are you ignoring me?" When I do answer, she calls just to gab about her job and to ask me what I'm up to, etc. Pointless. Meaningless stuff. If I actually enjoyed her company for more than 3 mins, I wouldn't be complaining. But I'm at the point where I need to just lay it on the line. Rip a couple shots on a random night, hold her hands in her lap, look at her in the eye and say:

"Look. Are we going to hook up or what? I already have enough girl-friends. I can't spend another sober minute with you without wanting to shove a melon-baller in my eye. But you are very attractive and I'd love to stick my penis in your vagina. I think I've paid my dues. So, you're either in or you're out."

I think that a girl would actually appreciate that honesty. Janice called me on Sunday afternoon asking me if I wanted to have drinks with her. She called me for drinks at 3:30 on a Sunday. For some, that would seem like a sign that this girl is definitely down... but I can see our good friend Janice playing the ignorance card.

That is, if I thought for a second she knew what "ignorance" meant.

How do I get out of this? How do I break up with Janice?? How do you break up with a girl who you aren't even remotely close to dating??