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Wednesday, August 22, 2007

My Friend Boned a Widow

My good friend Will, months ago went through the steps to legally marry couples. He's not a religious man, by any means and to this day I'm not quite sure why he did that. It's really fucking random. But I digress.

He plays on an indoor soccer team back home and a couple on his team asks if he do the honors and marry them. He agrees and marries them off. During the reception, Will tells me that this older woman (mid 30s?) is making eyes at him all night. They flirt the entire time and he decides to do a little investigating on her background...

Turns out, this seductress... is actually a recent widow. With kids.

Does this stop my friend from pursuing this milf? Absolutely not. I get a phone call from Will while he is tidying up his apartment (hiding his Gamecube) and running to the store to buy a couple bottles of nice pinot noir. Slapping my forehead and closing my dropped jaw, I wished him the best of luck.

At 9:00 this morning I raced to my cubicle to make a long distance phone call to get the details straight from the horse's mouth.

Will: Hey, I can't talk about this now, man. I'm at work.
So@24: Fine. But tell me what I want to know.
Will: Let's just say she got a babysitter for the night. I'll call you on my lunch break.

I guess that's one way to tackle the dating scene!