Blog Archive

Friday, March 28, 2008

Leo's Three Week Pinch

I can't take it anymore! She's driving me crazy! I can't sleep, I can't leave the house, and I'm here, I'm climbin' the walls. Meanwhile, I'm dating a virgin, I'm in this contest -- something's gotta give!
- Seinfeld, The Contest


My roommate doesn't date. He doesn't put in effort. He lets the girlies come to him. That's just how he rolls.

So whenever I see him in his 20 minutes back and forth texting sessions on his iPhone, it always piques my curiosity. Especially when I found out that it was a text with "that girl's" friend. Whenever I went to hang out with them, he'd always brush it off without the slightest bit of interest in coming with. Fucker.

But recently, Leo's been inviting her out with us. They've been texting back and forth. Highly irregular for someone who initially showed no interest whatsoever. And she's definitely not anywhere close to his type for potential dating material. So I went to the source, what gives?

So@24:
I've been noticing you've been texting this Cassie girl a lot. Are you slipping, man? You never showed any interest in her before.
Leo: It's the 3 week pinch dude.
So@24: The what?
Leo: -sigh- The 3 week pinch. Every single guy has it.
So@24: ...
Leo: Think back. Remember how you were crawling up the wall the first few weeks after not getting any? Well now you're fine, right? Smooth sailing.
So@24: -hangs head- Yeah, you're right. It's like a chain smoker explaining to a non smoker how good a cigarette is.
Leo: Exactly.
Leo: So, it's been 3 weeks. I'm dying here man.
So@24: You son of a bitch.
Leo: Uncle Leo needs to get his.
So@24: Ahhhhhhhhhh... the bachelor life.

Another lesson learned.